I had a big, full post planned for this week, but I’ve been under the weather these last few days, so you are getting some brief musing on color instead.
It has not been lost on me that all of the creations I’ve shared so far have been blue. It’s true that the cowl I recently made is grey, but I’m not really sure that will remain mine. It feels like it maybe should belong to someone else. And my new sweater is brown! And done! Buttons, blocking and all. I love it and I will post finished pictures of it, just as soon as this heat wave breaks. Because while I love it, I don’t love it enough that I’m willing to pass out just to be wearing it.
Still, I’m obviously in a very blue place. The attributes of blue as listed in Knit the Sky by Lea Redmond, for the purposes of a “mood ring” cowl: “sad, fearful, disappointed, exhausted, heartbroken, unappreciated, restless, unable to let go, shameful, hesitant.”
Well, that’s kind of depressing! Still, I can see how some of that rings true for me at this moment in life. Though I’m not sure that exhausted is a strong enough word. The truth is I have been feeling heartbroken and sad for various reasons.
Brown is “rooted, connected, centered, balanced, whole, secure, natural, earthy“. I feel some of that too, which seems like a step in the right direction. I’d like to turn that beautiful brown yarn up there, from dear Corina, into something for me, but I haven’t quite decided what. Four hundred and thirty yards of possibilities.
What do you think? Can color choice influence mood and vice versa? I believe it can. Though not in a one size fits all kind of way. While there are general cultural associations with certain colors, there are also personal ones. Like in my case, blue is one of my favorite colors and I find it soothing, which is why I painted my bedroom blue and perhaps why I’ve been so drawn to it lately?
Don’t forget, next week is comfort week!
Blue doesn’t seem sad to me at all – maybe that school uniform navy blue polyester! – but it makes me think of the sky, of happiness, of peace, of calm. We should liberate blue from negative connotations!
I am happy to hear that you will use the brown yarn for yourself. You deserve it! And it sounds like you need some rooted, connected, centered, balanced, whole, secure, natural, earthy energy in your life. Have you ever made any knitted, felted hats? I’ve made dozens of them (maybe even as many as a hundred!), and they are fun to make and great to wear in winter.
Blues have always been my favorite colors! I find them calming, centering and uplifting. I think that, in living with chronic illness and pain, we need to find a nest that is comfortable and peaceful. My husband has always called me “environmentally challenged”
. I think this need for comfort is especially true with clothing. Recently, I went through and got rid of everything that didn’t feel good to me while I was wearing it. We deal with so much just to manage our bodies– our clothes shouldn’t be a distraction or discomfort at the very least! The compression stockings aren’t going to do that. I guess this is looking at functionality in a very fundamental way– that the clothing we wear serves its purpose and does not detract from daily experience.
I always find color challenging when it comes to clothes for myself. I would like to have a simple wadrobe that all coordinates but then color becomes even more difficult. But I think whatever the color it should just make YOU feel comfortable and happy. Although I can’t even choose an apron color. I haven’t made anything for myself yet for this challenge as the children needed things and I can’t just seem to come to a comfortable place with my three month postpartum body.
Dear Katurah,
I agree wholeheartedly! This has been one of my goals with this project. The theory being better fit/alterations to suit me and my life = more comfort and less clothing induced irritability. One of the challenges for me is to both meet the needs of my rather tricky body and still honor my own sense of self. I don’t want to be forced into wearing comfortable clothing that I don’t like just because it’s all I can stand. It just feels like another thing to be stolen by chronic illness. It has to do with a sense of identity in a pretty substantial way. When it gets to the point that I’m only dressing to cater to my illness, which totally happens at times, it makes me feel like I’m being defined by my illness. That the extent of my identity is an unwell person and that’s the message I’m conveying to the world. I want to be so much more than that. I am so much more than that!
That said, I also don’t want to find a balance between comfort a sense of style. I want both! At all times. I recognize that this may be entirely unreasonable, but I’m determined to try!
Compression stockings are a kind of a touchy subject with me. I wear medical grade, full-length, compression stocking every day. Without them I don’t function well and I’m not able to do the things I enjoy (like being able to think clearly or stand up without almost passing out). But I also kind of hate them. They are uncomfortable. They are restricting. Good-bye barefoot walks in the garden! And at times they downright hurt. It’s always, every single day, a great relief to remove them at the end of the day. And I take them off as soon as I feel like I can get away with it. I finally found a brand that fits me well. They make the most comfortable stockings I’ve tried, by far, and I’ve tried a lot. In that way I’ve somewhat made my peace with it, but I still wish they didn’t have to be a part of my life.
warmly,
Melody
Dear Emily,
I am a chronic planner to the point of often being paralyzed by not yet having the perfect plan, whether it be fabric for a project or whatever the case may be. More and more lately I’ve been forcing myself to just dive in. Yes I might pick the “wrong” thing. But what is really lost if I do? Not much. And I’ll be closer to learning what the “right” thing is.
As to coming to a comfortable place within your current body, that was the very topic I had planned to write about. But I was feeling too wiped out to give it the kind of energy and thought it deserves. This is an important one. And something that comes up over and over again in conversations here. I will get to that post sometimes soon. Maybe it will spark some healing conversations for everyone. I surely hope so.
warmly,
Melody
Dear Melody,
Thank you again for another thoughtful reply!
I finally dived in and started working on making a Dottie Angel simplicity dress with fabric I had in my stash. I attempted my first ever snap\button placket to make it nursing friendly. Thank you for the inspiration.
Also I decided that I would spend time making clothes for my body as it stands now and not consider it wasted time if my body changes soon. I need to find a way to he comfortable now! Hopefully I can finish it in time for your comfort handmade wadrobe post! And I do look forward to your post on the topic of comfort with our bodies.
Thank you! Emily