Wednesday, July 11th, 2012
First, a note about the “before” pictures. The thing of it is…they disappeared. I don’t know how. I am absolutely certain that I took them. Several somewhat blurry ones featured Little Rosebud in her new (at the time) birthday poncho, dancing around her future room, as well as some other clear and more serviceable ones. Only, they don’t seem to exist anymore. And I know I’m not just going crazy because the before pictures from this post, taken that same day, are missing as well.
Below is the only picture I could dig up, taken the first time we looked at the house. You can also get a glimpse of it in the first photo of the post I linked to above.
Not done really, because the bed is just about the only thing in it, but a big change from what we started with.
The floor is a local wide plank white pine, finished with AFM Safecoat Naturals Oil Wax Finish. The ceiling and trim have been painted with Yolo Colorhouse‘s Imagine .04. The walls are Yolo’s Grain .01.
We made the executive decision that Màiri Rose should stay on the 1st floor with us, until we are ready to move up, but that Galen could move into his room whenever he pleased.
Only things haven’t quite worked out as planned. Because, as it turns out, the four year old that was all ready to be a great big boy with his own room has grown into a 6 year old that isn’t real certain that he wants that room to be on an entirely different floor from mama. He was very excited about the room being done in theory, but now that it’s actually done he’s feeling rather lonesome. The other day he looked at me with a quivering lip and said, “if I want you to cuddle me, you have to do it through the vent!” Oh dear. I’m really not sure what the solution is on this one, as our bedroom, which will be right across from his some day, is no where near done. I don’t know if we should take apart his bed and bring it all back down to the main living area where he never got any sleep, or take him into our room, with us, in a situation where no one will sleep, or what. And I also know that this isn’t really just about the room, but a whole bunch of changes for him in this crazy and sometimes scary business of growing up that’s leaving him feeling vulnerable.
He’s on the cusp of so many big things, things he’s been excited for and lusting after. Things that define being big in his mind. I can see that he’s panicking a little about whether or not he really is ready to leave the world of being little behind. Growing up isn’t always easy. Sometimes the internal struggle is heartbreaking to watch. I hope that with time he learns that we’re in no rush and he needn’t be either. That he can be our little boy as long as he likes and still have the advantages of growing older as well. But he seems to innately know that he’s on a threshold of sorts and he feels it more acutely than my other children did. All the Waldorf mamas out there are now nodding their heads sagely and saying, “Ah, the seven year change…”. It’s curious and amazing and sometimes hard. I don’t fuss about how to handle it (apart from the practical logistics) because I’m more than happy to give him whatever he seems to need. The hard part is watching him grapple with his own personal journey and knowing that all I can do is sit back and watch and be there when called upon. At the same time I know this is going to be an incredible catalyst for him and I’m really awed by the honor of getting to share this time with him.
The room is pretty anyway. And it will be all ready and waiting for him when the time is right.